stretching his wings

I took Bug to the park tonight- we have not been in about 6 weeks and I thought he would love going since I am traveling for work this week.

Everyone told me it would happen eventually- Bug would get to the point that he felt confident that I would not leave him and he would run off and play with other kids without coming back to check on me or hug me. I thought I had a few more years given his personality and the things going on recently. but, tonight, he never looked back- he was off with a 6 year and a 5 year he met and I was relegated to the sidelines as an observer. I know this is normal, I know this is a good sign, but I am still so sad inside. My baby is stretching his wings and learning to fly. I just thought I had a little more time of being the center of his world.

So here are some pictures from the sidelines- Bug was copying the 5 year old. the 5 year old was jumping from the top of the stairs, Bug thought about it and then decided that the 3rd stair was more his ability. And, just to point out, Bug was maybe a quarter inch smaller then the 5 year and 6 year old. Either they are smaller or Bug has grown some more in the last few weeks.

Did they make your heart stop? Mine sure did the first time.

the boys headed over to the big slide- bug's words were "we're going over there mom"

WOHOOOOOOOOOO

This one scared me - Bug flipped as he came around the corner. It must have scared Bug too- cause he looked around for me and commented that his face hurt. I was ready to step in and then he took off up the steps again to go down again.

He did some climbing here- but it was not as fun as playing with the other boys. He was all over the place for an hour- running, swinging, sliding, and just being a boy.

before we headed to the area with the slides, Bug wanted to swing. Little Man is quickly out growing the baby swing, but he loves to sit in it and be pushed. he does feel safer, but he wants to go high like the big kids.

Everyone told me this would happen- I was just not ready for it yet. I think I am going to be one of those parents sobbing in the car or at the door on the first day of school.

maybe I am just emotional because I will be away from him for 3 days. I always feel like something will happen to me or him while I am gone. I feel like I am lying to him when I tell him that "momma always comes home"- as if I can control coming back to him, that I can prevent something bad from happening. I know he will be fine and I will be fine too- this is normal.

Of course, I am looking forward to sleeping in the entire bed at the hotel and not having to watch Dora and Diego and having grown up food with grown up conversation. But I always end up missing him at bed time and missing him in the morning when I get up. i miss the quiet time of just laying in the bed and hearing him breath next to me. I miss his little hands reaching over to touch me during the night to make sure I am there. I miss him cuddle next to me and I miss the 'te amos" from the bedroom while I watch TV and do email.

I get back on Thursday and then we head to our agency's reunion this weekend. We are looking forward to seeing friends again- especially D and his sisters and momma (dad is away). I think Bug and D will have a great time playing together.

well, I have to finish the laundry.

Love and hugs,

Deb